Monday, December 20, 2010

Bipolar Medication: If You're Meds make You Tired




Hey, i just had a revelation today by accident. Usually i sleep 9 hours a night and I feel so tired in the morning. It was taking me like half a day to fully wake up. Today I slept 11 hours by accident and i've had a ton of energy since the moment i got up. I'd rather sleep more and have more energy when i'm awake then have more awake hours during the day, but feel like a zombie for half of them. I'm going to try sleeping 10 hours and see what effect that has on me. The medication I take is Zyprexa. If you're having trouble falling asleep and that is why you don't get enough sleep then a medication like Zyprexa will help you fall asleep. I take it 1.5 hours before i want to go to bed and it knocks me out.


Hope you're doing well.



Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Bipolar Medication- Taking A Day Off to Rock Out




I wasn't playing music as much as I want to so i decided to stop taking my medication for a day so I can rock out today. I had a nice practice session. I'm still skeptical about this myth that you have to take your meds every singe day, period. I really enjoy playing when i'm not taking my meds, but when i'm on my meds it feels kind of like a chore. Music is probably whats most important to me so I just can't see how I can take my meds every day. My meds allow me to work, which is good, but the website is pretty much done and i kind of want to be a rock star.
Maybe we can just take our meds during the week and have the weekend off to be our rambunctious (sp?) bipolar selves. Most people drink and get high on the weekend to escape, but we can get high all by ourselves...when we're not on our meds. Just a thought.
Maybe when I get my own house i'll have bipolar parties ("Mentally Ill Saturdays") where we can not take our meds that day and all act crazy together....I have a dream.
Hope you're doing well.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Living with Bipolar Disorder- Taking Naps


This is what happenned to the last person who borrowed money from me and didn't pay on time.....
I find that it helps to lay down when i'm stressed, or tired, or frustrated, or irritated. Its just pointless for me to continue doing something (like working for example) when i'm in one of these states because i'm useless and uncomfortable. I don't actually sleep I just rest my body and brain. This is time when I don't have to concentrate on anything. Often I get a lot of good ideas when i'm resting. Often I feel a lot more energized in 20-30 minutes of laying down. Then I can get up and start fresh. I'm lucky enough to work at home so I have the luxury of napping when I need it. Give it a try if you can. Its one of those relaxing things you can do during the day, like going for a walk.
Hope you're doing well and feeling swell.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Bipolar Disorder Treatments- Going 4 A Walk


Thats right! Walking is not just for old people anymore. My grandmother has been telling me to walk for years...shoulda listened.

Going for a walk is very relaxing for your brain, which for us with bipolar disorder is often difficult to achieve. Don't bring an ipod, just walk and think for a little while. Enjoy the fresh air. I get some of my best ideas when i'm walking. I make sure that I get outside for a walk every day.

Its also a good way to burn some calories.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Mike Wilmot is Hilarious




He is also from Toronto...a helluva town

Warning: if you do not like dirty sex jokes, do not watch these

Mike Wilmot on getting drunk


Comedy festival gala 2009


Mike Wilmot and the "C" word


Mike is also in one of my favourite movies, Its All Gone Pete Tong...check it out.

For more smile therapy go here:

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Art Therapy


I painted this I swear.
My brain wasn't working today; I couldn't work and I wasn't motivated to do anything. So I turned some music on and did a little painting. I feel a lot better now. You don't have to be an artist to paint or even make something cool looking. I didn't even have a plan; I just started painting and went wherever it took me. The hour or so spent painting was an hour that I didn't have to think about anything else. It was great.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Bipolar Medication: Its No Fun Being Crazy by Yourself


My little experiment with medcation is over...now I know why they do experimets on mice. I was able to have enjoyable hypomanic highs while being able to manage depressive and irritable moods somewhat, but I was useless when i was hypomanic and I was cycling like crazy. I couldn't work and since i'm too old to be in kindergarten that is a problem. I'm back on the medication full time and now that I am I feel stupid for staying off it for so long. The last couple of days have been great. Perhaps my bipolar mind created some nightmare of me being a lifeless, impotent, boring zombie on medication. It isn't like that at all. I have to sleep 9-10 hours a night and that isn't so bad. I can still play music and enjoy it. I can work withot getting irritated by every little thing that goes wrong. I don't feel as strong physically, but I don't plan on fighting anyone any time soon. I feel like Buddha right now. Hooray for Buddha pills! I'm on Olanzapine (Zyprexa) and it calms my mind down so i can think rationally (be smart) without my emotions getting in the way (being dumb).
p.s. Studies have shown that growing a mustache significantly increases the likelihood of one day being cured.
p.s. You're awesome

Saturday, November 13, 2010

The glass is HAlf fuLL




Yea, bipolar disorder sucks, but think about how much it sucked 1000, 100, or even 50 years ago.


1000 years ago you'd probably be ostracized by your community, tortured/killed, or imprisoned because of your extreme moods. You would not get a 2nd chance.


100 years ago you might get a lobotomy, get no help at all, or have to resort to alcohol or opium as the only things to numb te pain. You'd be an alcoholic or a drug addict and rehab probobly didn't even exist.


50 years ago you might be living in a mental hospital or on medication that doesn't work well, is unhealthy for you and has severe side effects.


Today we have welfare and disability to help us, when in the past you'd just have to work despite your illness or perish.


Today we have health care so you can get to see a doctor for free and get medication for free.


Today more peope know about mental illness than ever. People are beginning to understand and give us a bit of a break.


Today we have a lot of resources to get help and help ourselves. I came across a great site called http://www.depressiondodging.com/ recently for example.


Medicine is getting better and better. Therapy is getting better and better.
We have endless amounts music, and movies, art to inspire us and keep us going.
What i'm trying to say is that it could be worse way worse. Way worse.
Hope you're doing well
Take care

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Commitment and Results


George is the champ becauase he trains every day.

If you want your condition or your life to improve you need to make a commitment. For example, if you decide to do exercise, or eat healthier, or yoga, or meditation, etc to make you feel better you need to do it almost every day for it to be effective.


If you do it almost every day for a couple months you'll begin to see results.
If you do it once or twice a week you'll get nowhere.


If you do it almost every day for a couple of years you'll get the full effect.
If you do it for a couple of months, then stop for a couple of months and continue to cycle like this you'll get nowhere.


The same rules apply to being successful at school, work, business, etc.


Personally, I have wasted so much energy by giving up too soon and starting all over with something else. I've wanted to do everything and the result is that i've done nothing. You're better off choosing 1 or 2 things that are most important to you and focusing your energy on those every day than trying to do everything. Right now i'm focusing on exercise and music to help me feel better. I know that I am a long way away from where I want to be with these, but i know that if i keep working on them every day i'll get results.


I know its tough to stay focused when you're manic or depressed, but next time you feel like giving up think of how much energy you've invested already and how long it takes to actually get results.


Don't destroy what you've built, keep building.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

An Experiment with Medication- Week 1


Hey....When I take my medicine every day I am a very sleepy boy.

So i have been taking my meds on an on demand basis. Whenever i feel myself slipping, like when i start to get really stressed out, or really irritated, or i get too many ideas to actually choose or act on any of them, etc, I take the pills for a day or 2. This has been helping me to calm down so I can think rationally about what is going on and make good decisions. So far it has been working great. I have been feeling good all week. I've been experiencing the good feelings of hypomania without slipping into depression, irritability, or destructive hypomania for very long. However, i have also been exercisig regularly and spending time with friends. I don't know if this method of taking medication could work for more severe cases of bipolar disorder. In some cases it might be too dangerous for people to not take their medication every day. Also, the longer you have been taking medication the more difficult it would be to stop.
Hope you're feeling calm and alive.


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

An Experiment with Medication


i play the drums and fuzzball singS. we R looking 4 a guitarisT. email mE.

They say that you have to take your medication every day at the same time, but i'm just not convinced that that is the case. There has to be some kind of tropical island between zombie and spaz. When I take my medication every day I am sluggish for most of the day, timid, and sexually numb. As you can imagine, this is not appealing. I recently stopped taking my medication and have just been taking it on demand, when i really feel horrible. It has worked well for me. It numbs my pain, allows me to rest, allows me to see things logically, and resets my mind. After this i get to feel alive and creative again (though angry and depressed as well). I'm going to try to take it every other day and see how it goes. It seems like it would work for me. However, I am ultra rapid cycling and my depressed/irritable periods usually only last a couple of hours.


If your medication doesn't make you feel good you should change something. Consult your doctor before you make a change. Perhaps you can try a different dosage or different medication too.


Hope you're doing well and enjoying life. Don't be afraid to think outside the box. Your well-being is just as much your responsibility as your doctors'.


Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Social Assistance



Stevie Ray can really play
Just got my guitar back after it was in the shop for 10 days. The time without it was torturous because i couldn't find another guitar. I just sat there during the afternoon on my floor staring at the clock and waiting for it to be time to go to sleep. I was checking my emails like 4 times a day cause I was so bored. Actually, I had an acoustic for a couple of days, but its just not the same. My ears are too damaged to even hear it. My brain is too distorted to even like it.


Lets talk about welfare and disability. These are options for you if you cannot keep a job, find a job, or want a job, etc. We all need money for concert tickets. If you cannot work it is not your fault. If your job is too stressful and you're surrounded by assholes it is not your fault. Even sane, really smart people are having a lot of trouble finding jobs these days. Get some money from the government. We all hate doing paperwork and going to those stupid offices where you have to wait for hours, but its worth it. You can easily get information about social assistance on the internet.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Spit or Swallow?



Should i take medication or not? You should decide for yourself.

Are you on medication? Do you like it? If it doesn't make you feel good it isn't working! You can try a different medication or try changing your life instead.
Are you not on meds? Does it really suck? Do you want to die? Then there is no harm in trying medication. It helps a lot of people and some people it doesn't help at all. You can take medication to get you out of a suicidal state long enough to fix your life (go back to work, go back to school, bandage your relationships). Medication is not a long-term solution, but could save your life.
"My doctor says i have to." Doctors are wrong all the time. Doctors don't have to live in your shoes. You're smart. Listen to what your doctor says, but decide for yourself.
"But if not medication, then what else?"
Socialize. Go places and meet people (have sex with them if possible). Meet people with similar interests on the internet (have any hobbies?). Go volunteer somewhere. Get a job. Everyone needs people in their lives who treats them with respect. Go find them, because they won't find you. And if you don't look hard enough, the only person you can blame is yourself. It is impossible that there is nobody on this planet like you.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Be careful Who You Tell




People do not understand mental illness. I've told all my friends and I can't help but feel like they act differently around me now. I told them hoping that they'd treat me better knowing that i'm vulnerable, but it hasn't worked out that way. Most people have this kind of "eww get away from me" reaction to mental illness. I told this girl that I loved hoping that she'd help me and she won't even speak to me now.


I'm not saying don't tell anyone, just make sure its a person you trust and respect. Even though i am not ashamed of being bipolar I don't think it is wise to tell a lot of people. On the other hand, my family and some of my friends have been very helpful so I think you should tell someone.


Bipolar disorder has a bad reputation. Just saw "Shutter Island" yesterday and this manic depressive woman kills drowns all of her children. I've never felt like drowning children...maybe if they're really annoying and don't eat their vegetables...just kidding:)


Ya, you want to be appreciated and understood for who you are, but you have a life to live in this unforgiving and unfair world and you need to be smart. Some things are better left unsaid.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Hiding is Not Fun




Unless you're playing hide and go seek with 10 of your friends.


Hit rock bottom a couple of days ago. Felt pretty horrible, but pain is the best teacher. Had some revelations recently.


You need people in your life. Its stupid to try to get through it on your own when there are so many nice people around. I've been feeling sorry for myself that i've been lonely, nobody wants to do what i wanna do, etc. But was I doing anything about my loneliness? Not at all. There are so many ways to deal with loneliness. I posted an ad on Craig's list to find musicians to play with and i've gotten some replies. I looked for bipolar meetup groups in Toronto and there is a meeting coming up soon. I've been walking the streets looking for a job and have met some nice people (and got a really shitty job, but i'm feeling pretty humble right now).


Bottom line: If you want something you have take the initiative and not give up when you keep failing. Lets say you look for a boyfriend/girlfriend on the internet and it takes you 5 years to find someone you really like that likes you back. Was it worth it? Probably.


You can't just say and do what you want all the time if you want to have friends. I just had this phase where i pretty much just gave up on life. I was like: "Fuck this, i'm sick and there is nothing i can do about so i'll just do whatever i want and people should understand". That's just retarded. When you're mentally ill you can't control everything you do everyday, but you can control 95% of it. Use yur brain. What's the problem? What would a smart person do about it? I have damaged somer elationships and now I have to fix them. If people see that you're trying, they'll give you another chance, but they won't give you 8 chances so stop being a selfish dumbass. Friends that don't understand you are better than no friends at all. In my experience, people just get mental illness and i would just keep it too myself. However, if you feel like you're going to die or really need help you should tell someone you trust and respect.


If you give up on yourself it is nobody's fault but your own.


Hope you're doing well. Are really trying as hard as you can?

Monday, August 23, 2010

Music Therapy


Hey, its been a while.


I'm finished with the website and i've moved on to something else. I'm really glad I built it and I hope its helpful.


I've been playing music obsessively for the past 2 months and I haven't been taking my medication since I started. I've been happier than i've ever been in my life. Nothing makes me feel better then writing a song. I can't say that I never feel down or angry anymore, but I feel confident that those feelings won't last long if i'm playing music. Also, for once in my life I have found an avenue where feeling fucked up sometimes is actually an asset.


The point: I think the best medicine is finding something you love in life and doing that as much as possible (easier said than done I know). Keep looking. Its your life and you only get one so don't give up on yourself and settle for a shitty life of hell.


Hopefully i'll be a huge rockstar and write songs that will empower you

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Loneliness and Volunteering




I've been wanting to volunteer for a while, but today i finally got off my ass and actually looked into some actual opportunities to do so. I'm going to call a couple of places on Monday that are related to mental health.


Sitting at home all day and playing poker on the internet is a good job, but its lonely. I want to get out of the house and be around other people. A lot of people who get depressed are unemployed and doing some volunteer work is a good way to get out of the house while you're looking for a job.




In it you'll find websites that will help you find volunteer opportunities in North America. If you don't live in North America you're screwed. You'll just have to stay home all alone and think about how much life sucks. Just kidding:). You'll have to do the leg work yourself to find volunteer opportunities in your area.


p.s. You're awesome

Friday, June 18, 2010

My Shit "Vacation" To Ukraine




It took forever to get there. 9 hours flight, 9 hours bus, and hours of waiting inbetween.


My bag goes missing at the airport. My medication is in it. Panicking....Also, my camera was in it so i have no pictures.


After day 1 reality sets in...OMG I am in fucking Bratislava (Eurotrip) for 3 weeks without my meds. I was in a small town called Chernovtisi, which is basically a carbon copy of Bratislava.


It rained every day for the first 2 weeks. All my relativers were busy so I was sitting at home a lot lonely and depressed. Music videos on Youtube and the ocassional outing with my cousin were the only things keeping me sane.


Finally, after 2 weeks the weather drastically changed to very hot and sunny. My cousin had the week off work and spent a lot of time with me. I got used to sleeping and controlling my mood without my medication.


A couple days before i left i got some sickness. I woke up in the middle of the night with a brutal pain in my side arounbd my ribs. I was thought i was dying. My aunt had this little machine that sends an electric current through the affected area and that helped the pain subside so i could go back to sleep. I wake up in the same brutal pain a couple of hours later. It feels like someone is stabbing me in my ribs every time I inhale. "I have to go to the hospital!". Apparently that isn't that easy in a small Ukrainian town at 7 in the morning. They call a doctor to come to the house. She says i'm hurting because I caught a cold breeze somewhere. She gives me some needle in the ass, tells me its going to hurt bad and for a long time, and that all I can do is lay down and wait for it to go away. Gee thanks.


The pain went away and came back several times as my grandmother rubbed me with all kinds of shit, like honey, menthal, alcohol, to get me buy. I didn't sleep the night before we were suppossed to leave because I couldn't find a position to lie down in that wasn't excruciating. We get into a cab and go to the airpaort, which is about an hour away. About halfway in my side begins to hurt really bad. I make it to the airport and can barely breath. I'm walking around holding my ribs like somebody shot me. Luckily some people help me by taking me to the doctor there. She gave me a needle in the ass and some medication. She was shocked that the doctor i saw a couple days ago didn't giveme any medication. They didn't want to let me on the plane because it looked like i was dying, but the pain subsided after about 20 minutes and we got on the plane.


I went to the emergency room in Toronto as soon as we got back...Pneumonia. Thank you Jesus for not letting me die in that shit town.


There were some positives from the vacation. I stopped taking my medication and I feel good without it. It made me so antisocial and i don't want to just sit at home all the time. I appreciate Canada so much more now. This is such a good place to live. I got to spend a lot of time with my cousin who i get along with better than anyone. Oh, and they have 24-hour liquor stores.


Its so good to be home

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Boredom and Depression




I find that I get depressed when i'm bored and I get bored easily. I think everyone should have an acitivity in their life that is exciting. So far the only thin i've found that never gets boring is poker. It can be difficult when you're losing, but its never boring. I know that I can sit down and play some poker, and while i'm doing it I will not be thinking about any of my problems.


You can play for no money at a lot of websites, but I think its a little more interesting with a bit of money involved. Ideally, you would get a friendly poker game together with some friends and socialize a bit too.


Warning: poker is not for everybody. If you notice that it makes you depressed or angry, you should find something else to do.


If you have found activities that cure your boredom, i'd love to hear about them. Post a comment.


Friday, May 14, 2010

Drinking, Drugs and Meds don't Mix




Next time you get the urge to get drunk, do extacy, and smoke weed while being on psychiatric medication, don't. It'll just make you more depressed in the long run. Its good to see your friends, but you can't everything that they do when you're being treated for a mood disorder.


That cat is fiending for drugs. Its not as cute when humans are fiending for drugs.
You can find hilarious photos and videos here:

Sunday, May 9, 2010

I'm A Lucky Guy




I was suicidal yesterday and I had 2 choices: 1) Go to the hospital 2) or do drugs and go out with my friends. I went with number 2 and it was just what I needed.


All my friends know that i'm bipolar now and they are so supportive. I had a number of people come up to me last night and tell me that I can call them if i'm ever not feeling well. The other day i was thinking about how I had nobody to call if i felt down and i was so wrong. I'm so lucky to have my friends.
If you guys ever need someone to talk to you can message me on Facebook. Or try telling your friends. They may be more understanding than you expect.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Insomnia tips




In used to take a medication that helped me fall asleep, but I have recently switched medications. So the first night without the medication I couldn't fall asleep for hours. I was anxious, my heart was beating fast, and I was constantly shifting positions. The 2nd night I tried deep breathing. Deep breathing is just breathing in slowly as deep as you can and then exhaling slowly. I used to do yoga and I remembered how the deep breathing we did there relaxed me and made me sleepy. It was annoying at first to have to concentrate on my breathing while trying to sleep, but I kept at it and it helped me fall asleep a lot sooner. It relaxes your body, you get more comfortable and less fidgety, and then your mind relaxes as well and gets ready to sleep. Give it a shot if you're having problems falling asleep.




Sunday, May 2, 2010

How to Deal with Depression and Get the Most out of Your Day


I used to play poker for a living and I noticed that when I got focused before I played on what I wanted to do, I did well. So I thought “why not do this every day in life so that I can have more good days?”. It really helps to wake my mind up in the morning and get me focused on what I want to with my day, how I want to treat other people, and how I can deal with my illness.

Getting focused before you start your day can really remind you how to deal with depression and bipolar disorder, and help you get the most out of your day, everyday. Just ask yourself these questions to get your mind ready to have a great day.

What’s important to me?

- The things that are important to you are your values. Your values give you a direction to go in, in life. It is important to remind yourself of your values so that you don’t get off track. You want to spend your life doing things that are important to you.

What do I want to be remembered for when I’m dead?

- This is the legacy you want to leave. These are the actions you want to take. This is the way you want to behave. You want your family, friends, and other people you meet to say good things about you when you die. You want to be remembered as a fighter, not a quitter.

What makes me feel good?

- Everyone is different and it is important to know what makes you feel good so that you can do it as often as possible. You should do something every day that brings you joy and satisfaction.

You can read the rest of this article here:

http://www.depressiondodging.com/howtodealwithdepression.html

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Today I Hate Everyone







Today I hate everyone (except you)








I also hate perfect people (except you)








Don't drag me down (not you)








There is something wrong with me (and you)








I want to ride my bicycle (with you)




Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Managing Anger with ACT




A little while ago I came to the realization that my anger was consuming me. I was tired of being angry all the time and it drained me of so much energy. So a bought a book on anger and read it. So far, it has really helped me a lot. I've been like a buddha for the last week. The book is “ACT on life not on anger” by George H. Eifert, PH.D., Mathew McKay, PH.D., John P. Forsyth, PH.D.


ACT is acceptance and commitment therapy. It involves accepting your angry feelings instead of struggling to change them and making a commitment to focus your energy on the things that matter most to you life. You can't control what you think or feel, but you can control what you do about it. You don't want to spend your time on this earth being angry.
I summarized the importnat points of the book here: http://www.depressiondodging.com/managingangerwithact.html

Friday, April 23, 2010

Bipolar medication: Taking Your Meds is Crucial




I take 2 medications; one is a mood stabilizer and the other is an antidepressant. About a month ago i ran out the antidepressant, which I was taking at a low dose of 5 mg, and didn't get anymore. I thought that it wouldn't matter if i stopped taking it because it was such a low dose.


Now that I look back on it, my mood was very low and angry for the past month. I recently saw my doctor and got more of the medication. My mood has improved significantly over the past couple of days. I feel like a dumbass for not renewing my prescription.


When i saw my psychiatrist she said something that was so obvious but i had forgotten it for the past month. She said, "You have a chemical imbalance". We all have chemical imbalances and no amount of therapy or self help can help us if we're not getting the right medication at the right dose.


It is crucial that you keep taking your medication or get a better medication if you don't like yours. There are tons of medications out there and there has to be one that helps you get by without brutal side effects.
You can learn more about bipolar medication here:
If you need help sticking to a medication regiment, check this out:

Monday, April 19, 2010

Handling Your Bad Days




Even if you do everything within your power to deal with bipolar disorder you will still have some bad days. If your goal is to have no bad days at all, you're setting yourself up for disapointment. If you have more good days than bad days, you're doing well.


The other day I was so sad i just wanted my mommy. I can look back at that moment now and laugh at myself. Anyways, my mom wasn't there and i was fine the next day. This led me to a revelation about bad days...


You will have bad days, but then you'll be fine after. Your bad day will pass and you'll be able to move on with your life. Then you'll have another bad day, but it won't be so bad this time because you know its only temporary. You'll have your typical "oh god, its the end of the world" or "oh no, i'm a terrible human being" thoughts, but you won't take them as seriously because you know that its just your bipolar disorder fucking with you and it will go away.


Try to use your bad days to rest. Watch a movie, read a book, try to get inspired to move forward with your life again.


Just knowing you'll be fine will make your bad days less severe.

Visit www.depressiondodging.com for more tips on how to deal with bipolar disorder and depression.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Controlling Anger by Staying in the Present Moment


An effective way of controlling anger is by staying in the present moment.

Anger and depression often come together. People that are depressed often miss the underlying anger that is fueling their depression. People with bipolar disorder often switch between intense anger and depression.

Often we’re angry because of things that happened in our past. You can’t change your past and being angry about it just makes the present and future worse for you.

You can read the rest lof this article here:

http://www.depressiondodging.com/controllingangerinthepresent.html

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Fight Depression with Sunshine


We get vitamin D from sunlight and you should try to spend as much time as possible outdoors this spring and summer to fight depression. Vitamin D deficiency is why people with seasonal affective disorder (SAD) get depressed during the winter. When we’re depressed we tend to stay inside and isolate ourselves when we should be doing the opposite.

In civilized countries (like in the Caribbean) people don’t work from 12pm-2. Its called a siesta and people use this time to go outside, take a nap, or stay inside and have sex. No wonder they’re so happy and we’re so depressed. I want to live in the Dominican Republic during the winter sooo bad.

“The man” likes to scare you with skin cancer talk, but that’s just his way of keeping us depressed and obedient here in North America. I’m not saying you should spend every day naked at the beach without sunscreen, but a little sunshine every day is good for you.

Ideally, you want to have a siesta, but if your schedule doesn’t allow it, then try to get outside for lunch or even after work. Personally, I like to wake up and go play some baseball for an hour.
Go here for the rest of the article and some ideas on how you can outside more:

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Managing bipolar disorder: Its Not Your Fault That People Suck



You need to realize that most people are idiots and it doesn’t matter what they think. When managing bipolar disorder, depression, and anger it is important that our sense of self worth is independent of what people think of us. The only thing that matters is that we respect ourselves.


Take a closer look at your depression and anger. Are any of these feelings caused by ignorant assholes that don’t know how to treat people? Chances are that they are. Don’t let other people make you suffer.


Go here to do an exercise that will make you feel better about yourself:


Friday, April 2, 2010

Coping with Bipolar Disorder: Every Adversity is an Opportunity to be Great


I have had a rough couple of days coping with depression and anger, but I had a eureka moment as I was watching some show on National Geographic Channel. A plane crashed in the Andes mountains and not only did 16 people survive the crash, they survived in the freezing mountains for over 70 days! They had no winter clothing and they had almost no food (they had to eat dead bodies to survive). Search teams gave up on them but they didn’t give up on themselves. This got me thinking about adversity…

When we’re coping with depression or bipolar disorder we are faced with adversity daily, because even the simple things in life seem difficult. It is harder to get along with people, to enjoy things we used to enjoy, to get work done, etc.

When we’re depressed we dread adversity and see it as just another way that life is fucking us over. We need to realize and stay aware of the fact that adversity is not a curse. Every adversity is an opportunity to be great. Adversity isn’t around to make life hell, it is around so we can become better, stronger people. Your depression or bipolar disorder is just another adversity.

Sunday, March 28, 2010


I started working out again last week and i'm starting to notice my energy levels rise and my mood improve. I'm also starting to look better, which is making me feel better about myself.

If you don't exercise regularly, try it and stick to it for a while. Start out slow so you don't feel super sore the next day. Begin to challenge yourself when you notice your workouts are getting too easy.

BTW, hitting a punching bag is fun and a great full body workout.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Overcoming Depression and Bipolar Disorder with Small Victories


Small victories can help you with overcoming depression or bipolar disorder and feeling better about yourself every day. Every day is filled with opportunities for small victories.

A small victory is when you defeat your depression or irritability with willpower. Some examples of small victories are:
- Being kind to someone that cares about you even though you’re depressed or irritated.
- Continuing to work even though you’re having trouble concentrating.
- Going to the gym even though you don’t feel like it or you’re having anxiety about going out.
- Getting up at a reasonable hour even though you’re afraid to face the day.
- Trying again even though you failed the last time.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Rub The Irritability Away


Masturbation can help you deal with the irritability that often comes with bipolar disorder (just don‘t tell Jesus I told you to masturbate).

Sex is obviously preferred, but harder to come by in my experience. Plus you don’t want to just hook up with randoms because you’re irritable.

I’m not saying that you should masturbate every time you feel a little angry. All I’m saying is that irritability tends to build up over a couple (2-3) of days and you get to a point where you’re liable to lose it on any person that looks at you crooked. This is where you might want to find a quiet place to explode in orgasm rather than exploding in anger on some poor person.

Feel free to take a nap after too.

This can also be helpful before bed if you’re having trouble with insomnia.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Self Esteem Building- Needed a Little Self Esteem Boost Today


I was feeling not too good about myself today so I figured I'd use some of those self esteem building exercises on the site.


They really do help.


To feel better about yourself, go here:




or here:




or here:




It sure is nice not to hate yourself all the time.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Yoga for Depression, Anxiety, and Irritability



Yoga isn’t just for girls and hippies. It can be used for treating depression, as an anxiety treatment, and provide relief from irritability. It can teach you how to deal with stress. It relaxes your body and mind, and can make you feel euphoric. I often left yoga classes feeling very in the moment, free of anxiety, content, and confident. It can be especially beneficial to you people that are self conscious, pessimistic, and irritable. Yoga is also good exercise and daily practice is most beneficial.

Certain yogic practices have specific healing qualities for certain illnesses. Practicing yoga should be used as a supplement to conventional therapy, not a substitute. Yoga can enhance the effects of conventional therapies. Experiment and pay attention to what practices make you feel better and improve your condition. Yoga, breathing, and meditation cultivate faith, self control, concentration, determination, and patience.
You can read the rest of this article at www.depressiondodging.com/treatingdepressionwithyoga.html

Friday, March 12, 2010

Check Out Robin Williams Stand Up Comedy When You're Depressed


I spent a good hour today laughing my ass off watching Robin Williams stand up comedy. Its a great antidepressant.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Don't Rely on Anybody


One of the things that consistently leads to depression for me is people letting me down. I just can't seem to learn my lesson. I keep relying on friends that usually let me down and the result is always the same; me feeling worthless. Do my friends just suck or am I so worthless that I'm not worthy of respect?

It is difficult not to rely on anyone when you're mentally ill, because gettting on your own can be difficult. However, it might be something you might have to get used. Maybe its just my friends that suck (my friend let me down this week which is why i'm ranting right now)...Anyone else have this problem? At least I have family I can rely on. Thank god for mom and grandma...you're the best.

Its annoying when i get into a hypomanic state, because I feel so confident that people won't let me down (I can't help it). Then they let me down and I feel terrible. However, it does hurt less and less as i expect to be disappointed more and more. I think its finally getting through my thick skull that I can't rely on my frineds for anything and doing so only puts my mental health in jeopardy.

It can be a sad feeling not having friends you can rely on, but I think its even worse to be in denial. You shouldn't put your self esteem and happiness in the hands of people who are going to be irresponsible with it.

I hope you enjoyed my rant :)

People suck

http://www.depressiondodging.com/

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

You may outgrow bipolar disorder

The rate of bipolar disorder drops with age, which means that if you have bipolar disorder there is a good chance that you will not have it forever

University of Missouri researchers found evidence that nearly half of those diagnosed with bipolar disorder between the ages of 18-25 outgrow the disorder by the age of 30. 5.5-6.2% of people between the ages of 18-24 suffer from bipolar disorder, while only about 3% of people over the age of 29 suffer from the disorder. This means there is a good chance that you will becocme less symptomatic and recover in your 30s.

The high rate of the illness in young adulthood is likely due to significant life changes and social strain. In the the mid 20s people begin to adjust to the changes and settle down.

Another factor contributing to the high rate in young adulthood is the fact that the prefrontal cortex of our brain doesn't mature until around the age of 25. The prefrontal cortex is the front of the brain and it controls reactions to social situations...Aww, so that's why I suck at social situations:)

Bipolar disorder sucks sometimes, but I feel like i'd miss it if I outgrew it.

To learn more about bipolar disorder and how to thrive with it, visit www.depressiondodging.com

Friday, February 26, 2010

You Have Reason To Have Hope

Hopelessness is one of the most common and brutal symptoms of depression to experience. You may feel that your life will never get better. You may have problems socially or at work and feel like you’ll never be able to fix them. You might think killing yourself is the only way out.

Here are some reasons for you to have hope:

1. There are treatments out there that you haven’t tried yet. Keep looking and you will find one that works for you. Try the treatment section of this site.

2. More research is being done at this moment in time on depression and bipolar disorder than ever before. Not only are there many treatments that are effective but there will be new, better, and more refined treatments soon.

3. You are needed. There is at least one person in this world that needs you to be around. It may be a friend, family member, or someone that needs your help.

4. Self help works. Once you find a medication that makes you feel better you can use the strategies I provide in the self help section of this site to enjoy your day more, be productive, and have meaning in your life.

5. Depression is curable but nobody is cured instantly. Treatment will start to make you feel better, this will allow you to make changes to your lifestyle, which will make you feel even better, this will allow you to go back to work, dating, socializing, school, etc. The cycle continues until nothing is left of your depression accept a bad memory.

For more reasons why you should be hopeful go here: http://www.depressiondodging.com/hope.html

For smile therapy go here: http://www.depressiondodging.com/smiletherapy.html

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Dealing With Anxiety Through Visualization

Olympic athletes use visualization for dealing with anxiety and performing their best under pressure. They train 4 years for the Olympics and when they get called up to the starting line they have to get it right the first time, because there are no 2nd chances. Visualization allows them to practice in their mind before the real thing.

You too can use visualization for dealing with anxiety and being more effective in situations. Visualization is simply going through a situation or event in your mind before you do the real thing. After, when you do the real thing, it will seem more natural and automatic because you’ve already practiced. Plus, you’ll be prepared for any obstacles that might arise.

If you have a job interview that you’re nervous for, imagine how it might play out in your mind first. What kind of questions are they likely to ask and how would you like to respond? Imagine the interview from the interviewer’s perspective. What might they be looking for and how can you show them you’re the person for the job. Imagine any problems that might arise and how you’ll deal with them. See yourself calmly solving the problem and confidently selling yourself to your new boss.

For more examples of when you can use visualization to deal with anxiety or improve your mood, please visit http://www.depressiondodging.com/dealingwithanxiety.html

For programs for dealing with social anxiety, please visit http://www.depressiondodging.com/socialanxiety.html

Monday, February 22, 2010

Bipolar Disorder and Creativity is Not a Myth

Bipolar disorder and creativity is not a myth. You can check out the lengthy list of famous people with bipolar disorder for proof (and these are just the ones we know about). The energy and inspiration that can come with bipolar disorder can allow you to reach levels of creativity that other people can’t.

“If a man comes to the door of poetry untouched by the madness of the Muses, believing that technique alone will make him a good poet, he and his sane compositions never reach perfection, but are utterly eclipsed by the performances of the inspired madman.” (That’s you : )

Socrates

Poetry and art are not the only intersection where bipolar disorder and creativity meet. Creativity is also an asset in business, relationships, invention, and pretty much everywhere else. There might be an artist inside of you that you don’t know about yet. You should try to harness your “manic powers” and focus them on some kind of work or activity. Try the "how long can I focus on one things" game @ http://www.depressiondodging.com/howlongcanifocus.html.

“The volitional excitement which accompanies the disease may under certain circumstances set free powers which otherwise are constrained by all kinds of inhibition. Artistic activity namely may, by the untroubled surrender to momentary fancies or moods, and especially poetical activity by the facilitation of linguistic expression, experience a certain furtherance.”

Emil Kraepelin

Here are some activities where your bipolar disorder and creativity might be an asset: work, invent things, draw, paint, write/play music, make movies, act, sing, make sculptures, or spend time on any hobby you have. You might find something that you like and that you’re good at.

“From a part of the brain preternaturally elevated, but not diseased, the mind sometimes discovers not only unusual strength and acuteness, but certain talents it never exhibited before…Talents for eloquence, poetry, music and painting, and uncommon ingenuity in several of the mechanical arts, are often involved in this state of madness…The disease which often involves these new and wonderful talents and operations of the mind may be compared to an earthquake, which by convulsing the upper strata of our globe, throws upon its surface precious and splendid fossils, the existence of which was unknown to the proprietors of the soil in which they were buried.”

Benjamin Rush

You can accomplish a lot of great work with bipolar disorder, but you need to discipline yourself and focus your energy on one thing instead of letting it scatter all over the place.

Personally, my mood has improved tremendously and stayed high ever since I decided to focus all of my energy on this website and playing music. I used to want to do everything and as a result I accomplished nothing. Bipolar disorder becomes a gift instead of a curse when you focus on something that is important to you and forget about everything else.

Use your gift of creativity!

Go here for a list of famous people with bipolar disorder: http://www.depressiondodging.com/famouspeoplewithbipolardisorder.html

Go here for inspiration: http://www.depressiondodging.com/inspirationtherapy.html

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Improving Your Focus with the "how long can I focus?" game

“The ability to apply your physical and mental energies to one problem incessantly without growing weary…You do something all day long, don’t you? Everyone does. If you get up at 7 a.m. and go to bed at 11 p.m., you have put in 16 good hours, and it is certain with most men that they have been doing something all the time. The only trouble is that they do it about a great many things, and I do it about one. If they took the time in question and applied it in one direction, to one object, they would succeed.”

Thomas Edison (answering: what’s the first requisite for success?)

What the hell does Thomas Edison know you ask? Well, he invented the record player, the movie camera, the light bulb and a lot of other stuff.

It can be difficult to focus in a depressed state because of obsessive thoughts, self doubt, anger, and other distractions. It can be difficult to focus in a manic/hypomanic state because of flighty thoughts that like to jump from topic to topic instead of just staying put on one. However, I think we all can improve our ability to focus by challenging ourselves with a game.

The “how long can I focus on one thing” game involves choosing something to do and challenging yourself to keep working on it without getting distracted. Keep track of how long you can go for so that you can keep improving your personal best.

Personally, I have been terrible throughout my life at keeping my attention on one thing for more than 2-3 hours, but some of my best insights have come after sticking to something and not giving up.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

Thomas Edison

Good luck

Learn more about bipolar disorder and strategies to deal with it @ www.depressiondodging.com

For smile therapy go here www.depressiondodging.com/smiletherapy.html

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Bipolar Disorder Quotes

“There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness, and terror involved in this kind of madness. When you’re high it’s tremendous. The ideas and feelings are fast and frequent like shooting stars….But, somewhere, this changes. The fast ideas are far too fast, and there are far too many; overwhelming confusion replaces clarity. Everything previously moving with the grain is now against--you are irritable, angry, frightened, uncontrollable….It will never end, for madness carves its own reality.”

Kay Redfield Jamison

“There was no screech of tires, screams, or thunderous crash when my mind went flying over the cliff into madness, as I gather is true in many cases…One minute I was famous, successful, self-assured Harry Radcliffe in the trick store, looking for inspiration in a favorite spot. The next, I was quietly but very seriously mad, walking out of that shop with two hundred and fifty yellow pencil sharpeners. I don’t know how other people go insane, but my way was at least novel.”

John Ruskin

“Dylan was now having blackouts at frequent intervals. On more than one occasion he had been warned by his doctor that he must go on a regime of complete abstinence from alcohol if he was to survive…Dylan seemed exhausted, self-preoccupied, and morbidly depressed. He went out alone, and an hour and half later returned to announce, ‘I’ve had eighteen straight whiskeys. I think that’s the record.’ (Shortly afterwards) he died.”

About Welsh poet Dylan Thomas

For more bipolar disorder quotes visit www.depressiondodging.com/bipolardisorderquotes.html

For smile therapy visit www.depressiondodging.com/smiletherapy.html

Monday, February 15, 2010

Use Exercise To Combat Irritability

Exercise is a great way to combat irritability.

Being irritated is frustrating because you can’t sit still or concentrate and you don’t know what to do with yourself. I don’t go to the gym regularly, but whenever I get irritated I do a little workout at home. It is very calming.

You can lift weights, but from my experience, aerobic exercise is the most therapeutic.
If you aren’t a member at a gym, here are some exercises you can do at home:

1. Jogging.
2. Push-ups.
3. Sit-ups.
4. Chin-ups.
5. Hitting a punching bag or shadow boxing.
6. Squats.
7. Lunges
8. Leg raises

For a more aerobic workout, go from exercise to exercise without resting in between.

For instructions on how to do exercises or get more exercise ideas you can visit:

http://www.myfit.ca/exercisedatabase/search.asp?muscle=Calisthenics&equipment=yes

Or http://www.abc-of-fitness.com/info/fitness-exercises.asp

To learn more about bipolar disorder visit www.depressiondodging.com

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Learn To Forgive Yourself

If you have bipolar disorder and you want to be happy in life you must learn to forgive yourself, because not everything you do is in your control.

You may get depressed or angry and lash out at someone, or isolate yourself from everyone, or blame other people for your problems. You need to realize that this is what people with bipolar disorder do sometimes and it isn't always your fault.

You may get into a manic or hypomanic state and desperately reach out to other people, or feel like your too good for some people, or get shit-faced drunk and make an ass out of yourself. You need to forgive yourself, apologize if you've hurt someone, learn from your mistakes, and then get back to living.

I have destroyed some personal relationships and damaged others. I have spent a lot of time hating myself and feeling ashamed because of this, but I refuse to blame myself any longer. I've stopped drinking, i've stopped gambling, i've done everyhting I could to be a better person, but this disorder often causes me to screw up in some way. That is just the way it is.

Forgiving yourself doesn't imply that you should do whatever you want without regard for others just because you're sick. It means that you should do what is in your power, but not blame yourself for things that aren't.

Learn more about bipolar disorder at www.depressiondodging.com/whatisbipolardisorder.html