Friday, September 2, 2011

Do You Love Yourself?




I've stopped taking my medication for about a week now and i've noticed that I love myself again. It feels good. I feel like how I felt before i was bipolar. My medication tended to make me really timid and worried about what other people thought about me. Thats not how i want to live life. I'm not an expert on self love, but i think that its super important if you want to be happy. I think my self love comes from the inner strength and confidence that i feel when i'm off my medication. I don't feel manic I just feel an inner peace. I've always had this gut feeling inside me that we're better off without our medication and i think i'm now starting to feel it. I think the medication kills our inner beauty. It might make us better able to function in society but what is that worth if you can't feel happy and strong. Sounds like slavery to me.


Sleeping problems: Its been difficult to sleep at times without the medication, but not impossible. I bought some calming CDs like "Ocean Waves" and "Forest Sounds" which have helped me sleep. Personally, I can't sleep because my mind obsessively thinks about situations, but when I focus my attention on the calming sounds of the CDs then my mind can relax and i can fall asleep. I also find that it helps to eat something before bed.


Hope you're feeling well



Monday, August 22, 2011

Its Important to Work if You Can



Hey guys, hope you're doing well. Stupid google doesn't let me sign into blogger for some reason so I can't blog as much as i'd like. I've had it rough for the past little while. Unfortunately the medication doesn't help all the time. I have however been going to the gym pretty regularly and its does help.


I'm doing some courses right now to become a personal trainer. My exam is in about a week so wish me luck. It seems like a good job and you don't have to go to school for very long to get certified. It could potentially be fulfilling to help people improve their lives plus personal trainers earn a pretty good hourly rate. Its also an in demand job because more people are concerned with their fitness these days so its probably not too difficult to find a job. It might be something you guys would want to look into if you're unemployed and don't know what to do.


I've been unemployed for a while and it makes me feel kind of worthless (poor too). I think its important that we work if we can. It gives you something to do and makes you feel important. When you're busy you're either happy or too busy to realize you're unhappy. I'm also in the process of applying for disability just in case. I want to work if i can, but I want to have a safety net just in case I can't do it or can't find a job. You never know whats going to happen and i don't want to end up on the street.


Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Back on Meds




I had a good couple of days off of meds and then I crashed yesterday. I just hated myself and wanted to die. It was torture. It feels good to actually feel calm again. Its dangerous to go off your medication when you're bipolar, but I just can't help myself sometimes. Medication can make us feel lethargic sometimes and that gets annoying but if it wasn't for the medication, I and some of you, would probably be dead right now.


Hope you're feeling well


Sunday, July 10, 2011

We're Sensitive



We're more sensitive to stimuli than other people. Any little thing can make us depressed or manic. You can use this to your advantage by filling your head with positives and avoiding negatives when possible.


- Hang out more with people who make you feel loved


- Read something positive/empowering when you get up in the morning


- Get some exercise


Personally, I think mania is more of a gift than a curse even though your doctor probably makes you feel like its bad to be manic. When i'm manic I get great ideas, I feel a deep love for people who care about me, I feel no anxiety, I get so much done. Fill your head with positives on a regular basis and you'll be manic more often than you're depressed.


- If you're lonely, learn more about attraction and dating


- If you're pessimistic, try a self help book


- If you have issues dealing people, check out "How To Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie


Whatever your issues or insecurities are there are books out there for you


I've been off of my medication for about 3 days now. Its so nice to feel excited, confident and energetic again. I do a lot of reading to stay positive and it helps a lot.


Hope you're feeling well

Thursday, July 7, 2011

What Do I Do When The Meds Stop Working?



I'm sure the answer of the psychiatric community would be to to take more meds and force yourself to smile. The problem is that i'm starting to feel as bad on these meds as I do without them. I feel like a dead man walking. I'm sleeping 12-14 hours a day and don't feel awake the other 10-12 hours of the day. Everything sucks. At least when i'm off the meds I get to experience some mania once in a while and actually enjoy life. When I was suicidal the meds were good for me because they kept me from killing myself. Now I think I need something else. I think what i'm missing right now is a sense purpose in life and meaningful relationships. When I was buidling this website i was happy because I was doing something that was important to me. Ever since the site has been finished I really haven't had a good reason to get up in the morning. As for a meaningful relationship I don't think that i've ever had one and i'm not sure how to go about getting one. Everyone here is normal while i'm mental; this isn't exactly a formula for love. If this was a movie some pretty brown-eyed girl would come save me from myself, but it isn't. There has got to be a better way than these zombie pills and i'm gonna try to find it.


Hope you're feeling well


Friday, May 20, 2011

How to Stick to Treatment



One of the biggest problems with trerating bipolar disorder is that about 50% of patients don't stick to the treatment. This includes patients who stop taking their medication, don't take their medication properly, stop going to therapy or stop doing things that make you feel better. Whats important is that you stick to treatment and one way of doing that is by looking at the advantages and disadvantages of treatment.


Go here for an example of how to look at the advantages and disadvantages of treatment:



Hope you're feeling well

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Dealing with Irritability with CBT



Hey everyone, been getting a lot better at dealing with irritability lately. I think most of you would agree that it isn't fun (for you or people around you) to be irritable. I've recently learned a lot about cognitive behavioral therapy and I think that you could easily learn to do the therapy on yourself.

Here is a page I added to the website that teaches you how to change your irritable thoughts and behaviors to more useful thoughts and behaviors:


Hope you're feeling calm